Could you have an INTROVERT’S HANGOVER?
Everyone else seems to love dinner parties and get-togethers, so why do you feel like you’ve been hit by a bus afterwards? Chances are you’re an introvert and suffering the emotional fallout, discovers Ruth Tierney
PHOTOGRAPHY: GETTY IMAGES; SHUTTERSTOCK
Expert advice
Alison Rice is a personal performance and introvert coach who specialises in empowering people to embrace their introversion. alisonrice.co.uk
Dee Johnson is a psychotherapist at the Priory Hospital Chelmsford, Essex, who helps patients gain confidence and relearn social skills. priorygroup.com
Picture the scene: it’s Saturday night and you’re making small talk with a friend of a friend in a bar. At long last, you’ve ventured out to catch up with friends – but the overhead lights are jarring, the music is blaring and your ability to have a conversation seems to have fallen off a cliff. You’re surrounded by people having the time of their lives, but despite sticking to the mocktails, you feel drained and emotional. You make your excuses and head home, only to collapse into bed knowing that tomorrow will be a write off as you feel so completely exhausted. No, it’s not because you’re a party pooper or a wallflower (although you’ve probably been called all of those things), it’s because you’re an introvert, and you’ve overindulged on company, not cocktails.
When psychoanalyst Carl Jung first identified the introvert and extrovert personality types in 1921, the differences in their response to socialising was key. ‘Each person seems to be energised more by either the external world (extroversion) or the internal world (introversion),’ he wrote. He explained that while extroverts recharge their batteries through socialising, introverts boost their energy by spending time alone, happy in their own thoughts or creative pursuits. ‘When I’m explaining the difference in energy levels to my clients, I use an analogy about an introvert waking up with five coins.